How To Be a Cougar - capo III copyright Wanda C. Metcalf 2012 adapted from an article by Pamela Redmond Satran | AARP | November 29, 2010 Em B7 Em B7 I read an article today on how the cougar game is played Em Am B7 Published by the double-A R P Em B7 Em B7 Interested? Get a chair, pull it up and I will share Em Am B7 Em the low-down as interpreted by me Em B7 Em B7 First forsake your sense of taste, being coy and acting chaste Em Am B7 Throw terms like 'making love' into the grate Em B7 Em B7 the 'fast' girl from your junior high, whose mini skirt rode up her thigh Em Am B7 Em shes now the one you want to emulate C G Am Em Comfy underwear of cotton oops! that's better off forgotten C G Am B7 Lots of make-up don't be sparing! Hem and necklines that are daring Em B7 Em B7 Don't shave your legs but wax instead anything he'll see in bed Em Am B7 your skin should be like silk, as smooth as butter Em B7 Em B7 As always, cater to your guy. “Awesome” should be your reply Em Am B7 Em no matter what inanity he utters C G Am Em Don't give advice, you're not his mother; save 'you ought to''s for another C G Am B7 Be prepared to coo and flatter! For this it really doesn't matter. Em B7 Em B7 once started do not make a slip and think its a relationship Em Am B7 your cougar cub will think of it as sex - (or something blunter) Em B7 Em B7 but if that's really what you want be ready to reveal and flaunt Em Am B7 Em then chill and watch him flex his youthful pecs Em B7 Em B7 And when he leaves on some pretext, you can try his roommate next Em Am B7 Instead of getting bothered, hurt or teary Em B7 Em B7 And that's the crux of what was said in the article I read Em Am B7 Em On how a cougar acts, at least in theory And use protection!